On Life Experiences

It has been four months since my last post on here and seven months since my last actual serious post. Loads of things have happened since my two posts. I’d like to start by saying that 2015 has been a very interesting year for me and I still can’t believe it is almost over! We are already in August!!! Anyway,this year began for me with quite the excitement. I got a job that was relocating me to Dubai and everything else seemed to be going on as planned. As I was prepping to leave for Dubai, I received a message from my job that, I was going to be working at the New York City office for a few months on a project/contract we had with the United Nations. Initially I was bummed because I was looking forward to Dubai but then I figured it was a few months so it didn’t really matter and since I was being provided with housing and working with the UN it was all good. So I moved to  NYC to start work.
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Thank You!

It feels as if I have abandoned this blog but in theory, I have not. I have just been swamped with loads of work and sort of active dating life (more on that later).

I just wanted to use this post to thank everyone who sent me an email regarding “The Blame Game” posts I made earlier this year. I did not expect this massive attention. Better yet, I was surprised majority of those who emailed me agreed with my comments. Some shared the views of my mum sister and friends while others held pretty extremist views.
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On The Blame Game Part II

This is the second part to my two part “The Blame Game Series”.  The first part can be found here

Blaming The [Muslim] Immigrants
If [Muslim] immigrants want to stay in “Western” countries why can’t they assimilate and instead of always highlighting their “differences”. Look at other immigrant groups who have successfully integrated into their host countries’ culture/society. The Vietnamese for instance got their country bombed by the US and France yet when most emmigrated to the West, they have became part of the cultures of the US and France and you don’t see their descendants and children planning to bomb the US or France for past actions. Even [West] Africans who had their countries looted and destroyed by the West seem to have assimilated into the West perfectly fine as also kept their cultures. Sure there are racial tensions and not everything is perfect but they don’t want to kill inhabitants of Western societies. Also if [Muslim] immigrants are so sensitive to the portrayal of Islam and Mohammed why do they migrate to Western society that take pleasure in politically incorrect portrayals. Why can’t they move to Saudi Arabia or a majority Islamic country where there are laws that prohibit portraying Islam and Mohammed a non official way? They don’t have a monopoly on being sensitive and they should leave the country if they are going to be butt hurt everytime someone says something unfaltering about their religion. One cannot profess to coming to a new country for the freedom that it provides and away from tyranny and then complain about the new country. They should just accept the rules and laws of the host country period.
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On The Blame Game Part I

The Blame Game

This post will be a two part post about the Charlie Hebdo attacks and the world response to the Boko Haram massacre. I had a series of conversations (perhaps a better word will be debate or even arguments) with my mom, sister and a couple of friends. I’m sharing their responses along with mine via this two part blog post. These responses are by no means facts but rather a series of opinions. I believe everyone is entitled to their opinions no matter how ignorant it may be as long as it doesn’t explicitly incite violence. I was tempted to write a mega post about the attacks on Charlie Hebdo and the subsequent attacks in northern Nigeria by Boko Haram but I didn’t want to engage in online debates or arguments as I had already done so with my mum, sister and a couple of friends.

Besides I’ve already been told that I am not an expert [on people and religion] so it is best if I kept my opinion to myself. Additionally, I tend not to get personal and often play devil’s advocates during arguments which enrages others. Throughout the debates with my family and friends, I discovered very interesting tidbits about them. For instance, for a well educated woman, my mother is very islamophobic, my sister is not a fan of “free speech” and some of my friends revealed themselves to be very xenophobic. I was genuinely surprised by the opinions they had. Granted they were able to “defend” their stance, I didn’t know how to feel once they voiced their thoughts and opinions. They haven’t become lesser people in my eyes but I was certainly entertained . Continue reading

On New Year

HAPPY NEW YEAR

I still can’t believe we are three days into 2015. 2014 was an extremely eventful year for me. I was planning on doing a year in review post but I was rather busy and forgot about it. It will be pointless for me to do it now as we have already entered a new year but I will be writing about certain developments I discovered (about myself and others) before 2014 ended in the coming weeks so stay tuned for that.

This year, I don’t particularly have a set of new years resolutions. I figured I would continue working on a set of goals I created for myself last summer. Besides that, I am looking forward to the many things 2015 has in store.

Cheers to an exciting 2015 filled with an exciting and adventurous journeys. Once again HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

On Hateful Remarks

I have wanted to write this post for a very long time but every time I start, I get angry, stop writing or I just delete the post.

During the 2014 World Cup Tournament, I was accused of being a traitor, betrayer of my race, lover of the coloniser and other names I would not mention here all because I didn’t support my birth country (Ghana) to win the tournament.

My younger sister and other cousins who were not even born in Ghana called me a traitor simply because I didn’t wear the red, yellow, green colors to show my support for my birth land. It got so bad that I had to turn my phone off every time Ghana played because I would be accused of somehow sabotaging their scores.

While I know people get very attached and sentimental during global tournaments like the World Cup, I have never experienced so much vitirol directed at me.

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On Sex

Sex is one of those things in life that once you start having (doing?) it is almost impossible to give up. Its like the forbidden fruit as in once you taste it, you want more. Sure there are ways engage in sexual activities without becoming a nymphomaniac. I bet it is universally agreed that sex plays a crucial role in the world whether its for procreation or simply for fun.

Most people appear to be dumbfounded once I reveal to them that its been more than a year since I had sex. They think its incomprehensible that a guy like me (whatever the hell that mean) hasn’t had sex in over year. As a young adult, they find it very unusual since my generation and culture are obsessed with sex Even my sister says I am becoming a virgin yet she also insists that I should save myself for marriage.

I had numerous opportunities to engage in sexual relations with other people over the summer but I refused. One person in particular really wanted to have sex with me so badly that he went through with my 5+ dates rule but I after I still said I wouldn’t have sex with him (which mind you he knew from the start), he stopped talking to me. Another one also wanted to engage in cybersex but I refused him as well. He jokingly once told me that I am a weird person for not wanting to have sex.

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Father Figure

My current relationship with my father has been deteriorating for the past year and I refuse to be the person to initiate any reconciliation efforts. I will also not sit here and write bad things about my dad on this blog. I am also at fault for our tumultuous relationship. With that being said, my father and I were never really close like most sons have with their fathers. He was away during my formative years and I really didn’t get to interact with him till I reached my teenage years. There was a period in high school we were on the path to getting close but something happened when I was in college that altered that path. As I have mentioned in an old blog post in this website, I have always said I was born into the wrong family. While I love my sisters to death, I just have this feeling that I just don’t belong and I certainly don’t buy into the “blood is thicker than water” mantra.

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Another Year, Another Wrinkle

Earlier this month, I celebrated my 24th birthday and it dawned on me that I’m one year away from my quarter life crisis. Can you imagine! I will start getting wrinkles soon. The horror!!!

Anyway, turning 24, I realised I have achieved many things in my life that some people haven’t had the chance to do. I am eternally grateful for all the people who have helped me reach this point. Not to blow my own horn but I have a Bachelor’s Degree and a Master’s Degree from two world renowned universities and have some of the most amazing friends a person could ask for. So what is next in my life? Well I have a new job and will be relocating to a new country later this year (more on that later). It appears my life is going on pretty well but I can’t help but feel that I’m missing something…

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On Racist Encounters

As I have mentioned throughout this blog, I have never been a victim blatant of racism.

That changed about two weeks ago and it happened three times.

The first incident happened in when I went to visit a friend of mine in Boston of all places. To put things into context, my friend did not inform her flatmate that I was going to be visiting and staying with her for a few days. My friend is Asian and her flatmate is white. So when her flatmate saw me (I was alone in the flat at the time), she was visibly shaken and she just happened to have a knife in her hand. The look in her eyes very much alarmed me. You could see the look of fear, disgust, horror in her face. I almost wish she called the cops rather than me having to stare at the mixture of emotions on her face. After I introduced myself, she asked where my friend was and I told her she was out. The flatmate quickly ran to her room and slammed the door shut.

I know I would be scared if I came home and a stranger was lounging in my flat. But I would have questioned them and have the cops on dial if I genuinely felt scared or threatened. I also know my friend was in the wrong for not informing her flatmate about my visit but the look on her face made me feel like an alien. It was as if I didn’t belong in her presence. It was a very unsettling feeling. When I informed my friend about my interaction with her flatmate, she apologised to me and went to talk to her flatmate. Later that day, we talked about how my race played a role in the flatmate’s response. Would she have had that look on her face if I was white or Asian?. I reckon we will never know but the expression on her face is forever burned in my head. I’ve never had someone look at me that. I’ve never felt less than human. If looks could kill…

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