Maybe I’m too Nice…

A few weeks ago, I decided to delete all my profiles on gay “dating” sites (more on that in a different post) save for okcupid and jack’d. So I was intrigued by this new gay app called “MISTER”. MISTER bills itself as a more friendly and respectful oriented app/site for guys looking to meet other guys. With me being curious, I decided to try it out. I started talking to some guys and received a couple of “gropes”(I’m guessing its a form of wink or something along those lines). I usually respond with a “Thanks/Thank You” since its just common courtesy. So after sending a “Thanks/Thank You” to one of the guys he responded back and we engaged in a friendly conversation which ended up in a very surprising twist. Below is the entire conversation that happened over the course of 2 days. I have changed the person’s username for obvious reasons. Everything is verbatim. I may  also post screenshots I took

Day 1
*Guy 1 sent you a Grope. Respond with a personal message or a Grope of your own.
Me: Thanks for the Grope 🙂
Guy 1: no prob. Guy 1 hre. social wrkr. how r u
Me: Im well. Im D
Guy 1: Nice to meetch. wat yu do?
Me: Im a student
Guy 1: oh whr/what u studying. wat yr? 240 bdway hre u?
Me: Just graduated and I don’t understand the second part of the question
Guy 1: Do u hav mor picx? congrats, wat r u do’n now? wen com’n to nyc?
Me: I don’t have any more pics and Thanks. I am leaving my soon and don’t have any plans to visit NYC
Guy 1: too bad
Me: lol why
Guy 1: thought we kud get to know eachother an maybe meet
Me: Awww!! No worries you never know

Day 2
Guy 1: So y no mor pix
Me: I dont like sharing my pics
Guy 1: makes hard to get to know u…
Me: Not really
Guy 1: really
Me: Thats very false you don’t have any data to prove it. And I talk to guys who dont mind that I only have one picture
Guy 1: So liv in yur scienc fair
Me: Huh? You could say that. I always look for evidence
Guy 1: too bad. doesn’t interest me
Me: Thats fine. We all have our preferences
Guy 1: gud luk w. yur cold clinical psuedo intelectial approach to dating. Im sure yull get wat yur lookn for
Me: My apologies if I offended you. I don’t know if you are being sarcastic or you are attacking me. I never said I was looking to date, my life is more than just a series of pictures. Calling me cold ad pseudo intellectual is uncalled for. Just because we have different perspective on how we approach things does not make either one of us wrong or right. Good luck on whatever you are looking for
Guy 1: u too

Bear in mind that I was speaking with a 42 year old man. I usually refrain from speaking to people who can’t really spell correctly but I saw no harm in just a conversation. I am still in shock by the way he just attacked me and called me cold, clinical and pseudo intellectual. While it can be argued that I may have come off slightly agressive, when I said, he didn’t have data to prove his argument, I didn’t see it as mean. Surprisingly, he hasn’t blocked me yet…and I also haven’t blocked him


6 thoughts on “Maybe I’m too Nice…

  1. I’ve been in your shoes before (well, not your literal shoes, obviously. That would be kind of weird).

    I don’t know what I’m supposed to say in those sorts of chats. Kudos to you for sticking it out as long as you did – I probably would have given up; I’ve been known to use the occasional “u” or “lol” but what he wrote is unintelligible.

    I find that people who like to throw out phrases of judgement generally react negatively to being called on it. I have no empirical data to back that up, just lots of experience 😉

    I’d be willing to bet there are other guys out there who use proper spelling 🙂

    • Hahaha! Thanks for the comment. I’m actually surprised I was able to hold the conversation rather than just ending it. I usually don’t respond to people who can’t spell or begin conversations with “hi” “wat up” or its variations. I guess I was a bit naïve since I was talking with an older man! le sigh

      P.S. I love your blog. And don’t worry about the emoticons.

  2. I sometimes wonder if I’m too critical because I have a problem with people not being able to spell. I wonder if might be missing out on someone great because they send me an email and I don’t respond because they have poor grammar.

    I really enjoy reading your blog by the way. I feel like we have a lot in common. It’s nice.

    • I echo your sentiment and thanks for the comment.
      You may or may not be missing out due to the fact that you have a stringent approach to a person’s grammar. For me if I can legible read a person’s email, spelling and grammar does not matter as much but if the email/message is full of slang or if it has more than 80% spelling errors, then I rule them out as potentials.

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